“We’ll Work Till Jesus Comes, We’ll Work…”

The list of  “chores” I have to do over the summer months when I’m out of school far exceeds the number of days I have off. Since that is generally the case, I like to wake up on my first day that school is out and get crackin’ on my list. Nothing gives more pleasure to a self-defined workaholic than marking things off on a “to-do” list. (And yes, I’m that one who if I do something NOT on my list, I add it just so I can mark it off! You too?)

School released us on Friday at noon and rather than come home and start marking things off my list, I took a two and one half hour nap. In my bed. On purpose.

Gene and I then went out to dinner Friday night, taking our time and enjoying our meal and conversation; absorbing the feeling of having enough time instead of our usual “rush to get this done so we can get that done.”

I tucked myself in a few hours later, had a good night’s sleep followed by a mid-morning nap on Saturday. Followed by another good night’s sleep on Saturday followed by the ever-so-rare Sunday afternoon nap!

The reason that these events are so significant to me is that I had to give myself “permission” to rest like that. Resting is not my strong suit.

Early in my life I became convinced that my worth was wrapped up in work. I don’t want to place blame here but I clearly remember my mother telling me that I was lazy because I sat down to dress.

At that time, we only had heat in two or three rooms in our house and one of those rooms was the kitchen/den. (Our house was open concept way before it was cool!) Onward. At any rate, we could close the door to that room which kept it pretty cozy and I remember taking my clothes in there on cold mornings, sitting on the brown print sofa and dressing for the day.

It never occurred to me to stand up to dress. Maybe it was laziness. Maybe it was modesty. Maybe it was efficiency but nevertheless, I learned that day that I was lazy and decided then and there to outwork everyone to overcome that label. My worth was clearly tied up in my work.

Sometime after that fateful pronouncement in the kitchen/den, I moved back in (long story) with my grandparents. Papaw left the house for work by 6am and I can clearly remember my Mamaw cooking his breakfast and packing his lunch every single day. If I close my eyes I can still smell the smells and hear the whispered sounds of their conversation before he left. Mamaw always walked him to the door, opened it, kissed him goodbye and closed and locked it behind him.

Mamaw then set out on her own unwritten list of chores. That was decades ago and there were no dishwashers, garbage disposals, clothes dryers, trash pickup nor many of the other convenience items we live with today.

She broke beans, peeled apples, fried okra, mashed potatoes, made biscuits, canned fruits and vegetables, kept a spotless house and I don’t remember her EVER complaining for a minute. She was the hardest working person I knew and it was my goal in life to be like Mamaw.

When you consider that my worth was wrapped up in work and that the woman I admired most in the world was the definition of a workaholic (although joyful), it’s no wonder I am who I am and how I am today.

I have to give myself permission to nap. To stop. To ignore the popcorn on the carpet and the ring around the tub. And so far, no one has condemned me for it.

Due to Gene’s current condition with Guillain-Barre Syndrome and Hannah’s upcoming Biliopancreatic Diversion with Duodenal Switch surgery, this summer is going to be rife with work.

It will take prayer and discipline for me to balance what I’d like to do, what has to be done and what should be done. I will have to bring my plans and ideas and goals into line with what those around me need. I will have to call upon others when I simply lack the resources to meet the needs. I will have to seek God in all that I think, say and do.

As important, and even beneficial, as those first two are, that last one is crucial. And honestly, it’s how I should live my life whether or not I am a workaholic. And really, this summer, instead of attempting to fulfill my usual goal of spending the most time at the pool possible and getting a great tan (don’t judge), I think I’ll work on a new goal.

My goal this summer will be to be quiet enough to hear God when He speaks to me. So that I can hear Him say, “You’ve done enough today.” “That person needs a kind word right now.” “It’s okay for you to show you care.” “Be still and soak up this moment”, and so many other things that He says without me ever being aware.

I’m convinced that if my ear is tuned to my Father in heaven, He will give me the rest I require and challenge me with the work that needs to be done. The unique perspective for me though is this: there will be balance and as I obey, He will be glorified.

And honestly, that’s the kind of “work” I will gladly give my life for!

“Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10a

Moving on:

I’ve been reading my previous posts from our lengthy stay at Fort Sanders Regional and Patricia Neal and it occurred to me that I haven’t updated the FB world on Gene’s progress in a while. Since my exuberance over this being the next to last day of school woke me early this morning, I’ll take a few minutes to do that now.

Math is not my strong suit but I believe that today marks 55 days since Gene was released from PNRC. He has not quite mastered the power chair (as our walls and any other stationary thing in our house will attest) but has made great progress therein. It really isn’t a very intuitive operation. Gene says I’m a good driver and I’ve found driving the “Quickie” (it’s the name on the chair, I swear) challenging. My hope is that by the time he has it mastered, he can drive it out to the garage, park it and WALK away from it forever!

Due to constant prayers offered on his behalf by those in our family, church and community, his spirits remain good. Only those of you who know and/or are related to a self-proclaimed “Eeyore” know how significant that is. You know the type: they find the dark lining behind every silver cloud! Anyway, for the most part, he remains hopeful and encouraged and for that, I am so very grateful.

Besides the prayers being prayed, he is being well served by a couple guys who tote him back and forth to PT/OT so that I can maintain some normalcy in my job (which, did I mention, is almost over for the summer?!). A huge shout-out goes to Mike Miller and to Steve Shields for stepping in to help here. We have a couple other folks waiting in the wings; be patient, you’ll get your chance!

As for his moments in between therapy, he is reading TONS. I guess he feels like he has to give me a report as to how he spends his time so when I get home I usually get a report on what he has read that day which sometimes leads us to discuss what God is doing in (both) our lives which builds connection between us and serves to remind me that life goes on; chair or not. And one day soon, the chair will be gone but the connection will remain. ‪#‎allthings‬ Romans 8:28

Folks ask me all the time, “Is there anything we can do for you?” and to them I honestly say, “No, just keep praying.” There is much that God wants to do in us, for us and through us as we walk this journey and we want Him to have His way. As for myself, I don’t want to be like “…the horse or like the mule, which have no understanding, which must be harnessed with bit and bridle…” Psalm 32:9 Instead, I want to be instructed and taught in the way I should go, looking so closely at the face of my Father that if He “cuts” His eyes this way or that, I am quick to follow (Psalm 32:8).‪#‎laserfocusonJesus‬

Frankly, I need for “work” to be over; it will be at noon on Friday. For you see, not only do I need time to focus on Gene’s rehab (and oh my, what a plan we have for his summer!), I also need to encourage Hannah as she begins her 4 week march toward her surgery on June 15.

By the time we got to Wednesday night Bible study last night, I was pretty wound up. I really can’t say why but nonetheless, I was. Anyway, I told one of my friends “…my stress level is an 11 out of 10!” And that’s true. Like I said, I need for work to be over! I feel like I have my feet in two totally separate worlds and those worlds are constantly shifting, keeping me seriously off balance.

Those of you who have folks in your home who need constant attention know what I mean: they are never out of your thoughts: every cotton-picking-thing you do is a process that had better be planned out in advance or you’ll never get anywhere on time, when you’re at home you hope things are okay at work, when you’re at work, you hope everything is okay at home, etc., etc. I DESPERATELY want to put both feet on one solid surface and stand there for a minute. After tomorrow at noon, I get to do that.

On that note, if you ask me to do something in the coming weeks and I’m not available, please understand that I still love you and appreciate the invitation and want (truly) to be included, but my life currently MUST be about the health of “my people”. I’m not good at creating margins in my life (think: Wonderwoman) and telling anyone no to anything is just killer to me (because I CAN do it all, right? WRONG!)! Still, you may hear that response and I hope you’ll understand.

Well, that’s it (in a nutshell). Again, continue to pray for us. Pray for Gene’s healing (certainly) but above all, pray that God would be glorified in us as He works out His will for us. No matter the impression I may give at any time, anywhere, this has NOT been easy. There are days when I honestly think (and say out loud to God), “I’m not going to make it through this day.” And then like an ambulance on high alert, God’s grace rushes to my aide and I more than make it through! His grace truly is amazing!

Time for a little praise!

"Well. We’ve been home for 9 days now and I think it’s time for an update. First of all, let me say (as I’ve said again and again) THANK YOU to all of you who have prayed, called, texted, given cash, gift cards, time and in general, generously of yourselves on our behalf.

Although this circumstance wherein we’ve found ourselves is inconvenient and at times, confusing, we’re grateful for its invasion for several reasons but for one in particular: we have been reminded of not only the goodness of God but the gracious willingness of God’s people to “Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2)

As mentioned in an earlier post, one of the first things we noticed about our home when we learned that Gene Wood would be coming home in a wheelchair (power chair now) was that the only door that would accommodate a chair of that width was the front entry door. The ramp would be built so that Gene could come in through the garage door so, thanks to James Pyles and Ed Burress, we have a new ADA entry door off the ramp into the house. And the ramp? It’s perfect. Thanks to those two guys and their able assistants: Cory Wyatt and Dylan Wyatt and Josh Pressley

And that van I said we'd need (from an earlier post)? Yes, we've got that too. Mark Flatt, a friend from our Stock Creek days had a friend with an "extra" handicap van (who in the world has an extra handicap van??) and she has loaned it to us. There's quite a learning curve on the strapping in and all, but I'm learning and have it down to about 10 minutes. And that's while wearing white pants! ‪#‎iamimpressedwithmyself‬

Since Gene “most likely” would need access to a bathroom, they also removed his original bathroom door; sheet rocked the opening and moved the opening over 8 inches so that he could access his sink, commode and shower. To make it pretty (and make me oh-so-happy!), they installed a beautiful sliding barn door at the new opening! And of course, they had help from Cathy Burress and Mike Miller with that massive project (he and Kim Cooper Miller also did some serious work in the garage!). I’ll paint the bathroom and the bedroom this summer and will then put up a picture so you can see their handiwork. You’re gonna love it!

The bed had to be lowered 5 inches so it’s now off the frame and directly on the floor. No biggee. We’ve moved a couple furniture pieces to the storage unit, which, by the way, is worth every penny since our garage is now a garage instead of a storage space for Gene’s (and Hannah’s!) books!

Gene’s “daily sustenance” items have been moved to accessible shelves and kitchen gadgetry has been pulled closer to the edge so that he can make his own coffee, toast his own bread, microwave his own left-overs, etc. Modifications like those are oh-so-easy. My hat is off to those of you who have been doing this sort of thing forever and who will do it forever more because your loved one WON’T ever get out of their mobility device. My heart hurts for you.

Today was Gene’s first Sunday back in the pulpit and it was (at least for me) a special time. Our brothers and sisters stepped up once again and built a wide and sturdy ramp for Gene to access the stage and we believe that one day he will STAND on that stage to deliver God’s Word. For now, preaching from the chair will suffice. After all, scripture indicates that Jesus sometimes sat to teach.

Luke Wood, Sara Wood, Hannah Wood and Andy have done everything I’ve needed and everything I’ve asked them to do. Our extended families have been amazing and faithful in love and prayers. We simply could not ask for more!

Physical therapy/Occupational therapy hasn’t started yet and we are anxious for it to. Gene will be an outpatient at Patricia Neal and apparently they are backed up so it may be another week before they can get him scheduled. That’s frustrating; in the meantime we plan to go to our gym and use similar equipment there. We’ve been members for 3 years, seems like it may be time to find out what they offer!

Kelli Parker, a young lady you may have seen on TV, has a new show premiering Thursday evening (April 7) at 6:30 on Fox 43 called “The Good Life”. Gene and I will share our story with her (and you if you watch!) in the first episode. Shameless plug: Kelli is a good girl with a good plan and you should give this show a shot! ‪#‎welovekelli‬

As a result of the aforementioned interview, we were again given generous, thoughtful gifts from folks we’ve known for many years. Church members from every church we’ve served in over the last 39 years have contacted us. Literally. I actually had a phone call last night asking about our vacation plans this summer. When I replied that we probably wouldn’t be taking a vacation this year, they said they suspected as much and would like to give us a week at their time-share. Well yeah. We’ll do that! God is so good!

Wow. That’s quite an update. Bottom line: a real bummer of a thing has happened to Gene Wood. But it’s going to be okay. He’s going to be okay. We’re going to be okay. And if things don’t change? We’ll still be okay. Why? Because like my new theme song says: “You’re a good, good Father.” His will for my life, our life, is perfect, even when inconvenient and uncomfortable. He can be trusted. Do you trust Him?"

Plans? What plans?

"Remember that time when you had a plan and then it changed on a dime? Our plans, mine & Gene Wood's, have been like that for the last 42 days. Six weeks ago this morning he went into the hospital for what was to be a routine surgery and be discharged the next day. Yet, here we are 6 weeks later, still in the hospital. The latest: he became dizzy, nauseated and started throwing up last evening. Since this is the (at least) 2nd bout of this during his stay, the doctor ordered an MRI. Also, since he has to have his MRI with general anesthesia, I was called to come to the hospital this morning at 9ish. At about 1:30 this afternoon the nurse came in to say that the MRI would be on Wednesday, they just couldn't get to him today. So, while (in my mind) I should be going to bed tonight all giddy because my man gets to come home tomorrow (that was the plan, after all). Instead, I'm going to bed "assuming" that he will have an MRI tomorrow (still don't know what time) and that pending the results, will come home Thursday. At least that's the plan i'm hoping for. Not banking on. Because as we know, plans can change on a dime!"

So close yet, so far away:

"Some good news: Gene's home evaluation today went well. The work that has been done on the house to accommodate his wheelchair/power chair (we're not sure exactly what he'll come home with but ultimately he'll have a custom power chair) has been perfect!

Some not as good news: they are keeping him another week. I don't know if that means a week from Wednesday when the "team" met or a week from Friday, his original discharge date. But either way, he's not coming home tomorrow. Boo for that. But we definitely want him READY to BE home when he COMES home!

PRAYER REQUEST: all of the "loaner" power chairs are out right now. It will take up to 60 days to build his. Pray that a power chair comes available before he comes home.

And let me say again, God has been so faithful to us and has used the body of Christ as an amazing picture of how we are supposed to work together in support of one another. You are a blessing to us and in so being, are bringing glory to God."

The saga continues:

"Three weeks ago tomorrow, my husband walked into Fort Sanders Hospital for "day surgery." He can't walk anymore. Well, for now anyway. Sorry to be melodramatic but geez, this was NOT supposed to happen. I mean, it wasn't even part of the 73 page manifesto that we signed warning us of all the things that COULD happen. So as you might imagine, I'm ticked about this situation but being ticked doesn't really solve anything, does it? So, I'm really trying to seek God during the "ins and outs" of Gene's inability to function as he'd like and gladly sit still under the Sovereign Hand of God. Rant/sermonette over. First of all, the pneumonia is mostly gone; the secondary infection is hanging on. They've changed antibiotics for that one and will check him again in 2 days to see how it's working. The Rehab Doctor, Dr. Glass, said that the CONVERSATION about Gene's release will begin on Wednesday. Of course we have things to do around here to get ready for his arrival but still, he will be home sooner than later, we hope. Please continue to pray for his steady improvement especially as it pertains to his "transfers" from bed to wheelchair, wheelchair to chairs, etc. We plan to rent a unit and unload our garage making space for the ramp we will have built and of course, the furniture in the house will need to be rearranged. We will also need a vehicle (think: van) to get Gene from home to PT to home to church to home to...well, you get the idea. Bottom line: we have every reason to believe that this malady is completely reversible BUT it will take time. Time we have, patience we lack. I'll speak for myself on that one; on that note, goodnight."

On to more information:

"Thanks Hannah Wood for your update from earlier this week. Today is Friday, Feb 12 and here's what's happening in our room at FSR. Gene Wood had an EMG (nerve conduction) this am which was "negative". The "Dr. House"-like hospital neurologist came in and scratched his head (as the parade of doctors before him) and suggested that the collective brain trust consider Guillian-Barre (google it). Not a diagnosis, mind you, just something to consider since nothing else is showing up and NONE OF THEM HAVE EVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THIS BEFORE. Why can't we just be normal? Anyway, PT has been in and he's currently up in a chair. We are awaiting word from the Patricia Neal facility to see if he will be accepted there where he can get some intensive PT/OT. In the meantime, there are 50 ceiling tiles in this room, 6 electrical outlets and no working clock. Not that it's a boring place. Quite the contrary, there's a steady stream of confused faces in and out the door. And we've had some lovely guests too, whose faces weren't confused in the least to see their family member/friend/pastor in a sexy hospital gown with his Bible open and pens at the ready. He is a predictable sort. We wait. We pray. We trust God and we love you."

For the purpose of context, what follows is a Facebook update that Hannah Wood wrote on my behalf the day after Gene's surgery left his right leg paralyzed. 

"For all of my parents Facebook friends, Luke's Facebook friends, and my own, here is an update on my dad.

Yesterday my dad had spinal fusion surgery. The surgery went well and everything looked good. However, dad was unable to move his right leg. He has some sensation in it but cannot move it or even wiggle his toes. The doctor has been great and was very concerned so they did both a CT scan and a MRI. Both were inconclusive. Dr.Norman took dad back to surgery this afternoon to recheck everything and look for a blood clot or something that might be compressing a nerve. Nothing was there.

So the plan now is for dad to stay in the hospital for 2-3 more days while they run more tests including a nerve conduction test and having a neurologist check as well. After that he will be moved to Patricia Neal to rehab and try to get the leg working.

This of course was nowhere in our plans and we are in shock so to speak because of this complication. Please pray for my Dad as he works through this and his doctors as they look for answers. The rest of us would appreciate your prayers to as we adjust and help my Dad with whatever comes. Thank you so much for supporting our family and praying for us."